I’m here sitting this morning in my great room by the fireplace just full of gratitude and amazement about the year that I just went through. I have an appointment this morning at 8:30 for a follow-up MRI to my kidney cancer diagnosis. It’s hard to believe it’s only been a year. It feels like a lifetime.

Breaking Away from Distraction & Feeling Gratitude

It’s so amazing how your mind just carries on with your life, how quickly we could forget how fragile life is, and how grateful we need to be for every day. There’s just so much distraction and confusion, and cowardliness in the world that we’re quickly drawn away from our inwardness and forced to deal with day-to-day insignificant things.

I so often express the need to sit still in the morning and be grateful and meditate but, I think I need to add to that by saying how important it is to look back at where you’ve been to be reminded of the journey it is that you’re on and the amazing miracles that take place every day, that if we’re not careful, we will certainly miss.

Finding Stillness to Evoke Gratitude

I needed this day today. I needed to go back into the medical community and lay down on that cold hard table and try to clear my mind while they push my body through a machine to look at the inside. Just quite an analogy to how we need to lay down, sit still, and let our minds and our hearts do a scan to know where we are and what might be next for our lives.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could do a body scan to tell us what’s really going on in our heart, what we’re really thinking in our mind, what we’re really believing, and where our treasure really is? Wouldn’t it be a much better world if we could do that? Wouldn’t it be really, really cool if I could invent a scan that would look into your heart, take a picture, and then lay it all out in a report? It could let us know where the emotional, mental and spiritual disease is in our body. It’s an interesting thought.

Separating Heart from Mind

Over the last year, I learned about my thoughts, my brain and how my brain was just another body part, and how so many of my thoughts were simply replayed recordings of different years gone by. How different my brain is from my heart, and how do we really begin to understand how to separate those two organs.

In reality, there are two organs that we think of as more than just organs. There’s your heart that keeps you alive and pumps life throughout the body. The brain that is the computer that records data all day long.  We separate the mechanical functions from what is truly the spiritual realm of those organs. I find it interesting that your heart is the thing that keeps you alive physically, yet your heart also expresses spirituality or what you’re all about at a higher level, where your treasure is, where your passion is, and what motivates you every single day.

Your Thoughts Aren’t Who You Are

I’ve learned to realize that you have to be careful about separating your thoughts from your heart and your thoughts from who you are. My thoughts are not who I am. They are simply a playback of historical data that my brain has recorded like the greatest computer ever made. That is so important, because it allows me to do what I’m doing right now. For me, I have to be so careful to remind myself that so many of my thoughts are not necessarily who I am. It is what’s in my heart that’s important. And every day, I need to sort through those thoughts and check them like checking a coded closet. Check them to understand where they’re coming from, why they’re coming, and what I need to do about them.

Gratitude as a Child of God

From the deepest depths of my heart, I want to thank God this morning for who He is, for allowing me to be part of His family – to be a child of God. Most importantly, I have so much gratitude for the love that has surrounded me this past year. To all of you who have helped me in this journey, not just to lift me up, but to teach me how to be a better version of myself and help me grow so that I could help others to grow. I am grateful this morning to be reminded of what a miracle I truly am.  I am worthy. So are you.

Hugs & love,
Renee

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